Ungli- The Finger!!!!!!!

Ungli

-the finger!!!!!


The chromosomal aberration made me stand up in the crowd,

“Bull shit, are you this insane?”

Then I thought for a while…

Ok, one finger can change this world…

“Not that one, you d*ckhead!”

Ahh yes…but really? Interesting… I always thought it was the one next to that… Well, one lives and learns…

“Out of the way, it’s a busy day!” the poster bearer cried. He came and stood next to me, huffing and puffing as he stuck a small poster onto the wall next to me.

“Dude,” I said, “who is this?”

From the looks of that guy, he appeared to be the paan-waala, whom I owe about a hundred bucks today. For I moment, I reeled. I squinted and I read, “ Vote for the Lion’s Claw. Pappu Bhai, Dadar.”

“Yeh hamare honewaale Prime Minister hain!” the poster-boy spoke, with a shine in his eye and just about the right tone in his voice, as if he had been crucially instrumental in helping the paan-waala become India’s next Prime Minister.

This wasn’t my paan-waala. He had a mole on the other cheek.

I looked closely again.

Ok, what was this guy running for? Well I had no idea about his intentions but going on his face I believed him to be extremely suited for the post of BEST conductor. Nothing more, nothing less…

That cant be, I argued with myself. Is he running for the Chief Minister? That’s the only post that came to my mind. MLA? Many movies show Nana Patekar as the MLA. That’s where I picked up that word. Police Commissioner? Do they have elections for that?

“Dude, you are pathetic!” the guy left me groping in the dark.

This time he used the correct finger.

“You are the future of the nation, my friend, and I still don’t see you waking up!” he said as he left.

I looked at the poster again.
Nope, not my paan-waala, I said to myself and left.



“Kitni baar bolu aapko, who Pappu Bhai hain, mein nahi! Aur mera paisa kab lautane waale ho?”

I lit up my Benson and somehow things became clear.

It was the day for elections.

How could I forget? I was ashamed of myself. Such an important day. I had circled it on my calendar about a month ago. I raced through the stick, I was in no mood of wasting it.

“Hey sweetie! Happy Anniversary! I am so sorry I forgot! Lets celebrate! What? Really? You’re kidding! No booze? … Aaah! Of course, elections! Dry day! Stupid democrats! Really? That’s just in the US? What do we have here? … uh huh…yea…whatever…What say we vote for Pappu Bhai! At least we’ll get some booze!”

I kept down the phone.
What a sad little day!

“Thank God, I at least have you my little magic-stick! No election’s gonna take you away from me!”





“That’s the last time I am telling you! You have to contribute a hundred bucks for the event! Pappu Bhai’s orders! Its his birthday! A joyous occasion. If you don’t pay up we’ll beat up sp badly, you won’t have teeth left to smile at his party!”

“Why the fuck should I pay? I owe that paan-waala a hundred bucks.”

This was when the crushing blow came to my knees.

He made a valid point. I had to pay.

Something shouted at the back of my mind. Don’t pay! Shit did I say that out loud?

Another blow came down on my shoulder.

Yes, you did.

Is this really worth for a hundred bucks. Just pay up!

I really had no idea you were this weak!

These voices in my brain went on and on, coming to no conclusion at all. Meanwhile, these men were making some strong arguments.

Ok I guess I have to pay up.

Suddenly I heard another voice resonating through my head.

“Not that one, you d*ckhead!”

Of course!

The finger!

It took a while to gather enough courage but I stood up. And up came the finger.


I have no idea how, what, why? But suddenly I saw them trembling. One of them already had starting running away.

Yes! Fucking cowards! Run away!

The guy who had made me a mess started sweating and for a moment was stunned. He just stood there, doing absolutely nothing. Even he followed suit.

Run away, you bastards! Messing around with me, eh?



It was an hour later. I was in the line, smiling, bleeding and enjoying the smell of success and power.

For once I was powerful. I felt untouchable. I felt invincible. I felt indestructible.

That is the power of one finger.

That’s when it made me think… Definitely, I have been missing out on this thing for years now. It’s not a right. It’s a fucking hand-grenade! I could walk straight for once. I could look every person in the eye and say, do you have the guts to yell at me?

Sometimes, I realized, ungli karma acchi baat hain!


Eddie Lithium